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 Sound and Fury: General Discussion [all categories]
 Sound and Fury
 Real-Life Stories (Page 1)
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elizowen Administrator Posts: 17 |
posted 10-10-2000 09:40 AM
  
Share your own experiences as a deaf person living in a hearing world (whether with or without a cochlear implant), or as a hearing person who interacts with the deaf community. |
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oldnavychic New Member Posts: 1 |
posted 12-03-2000 09:58 PM
I live in Ca. and I just wanted to share that I know a 3 and-a-half-year-old who was implanted at about 13 months of age. He goes to a school where all deaf students in my county are mainstreaned, because they have a preschool program. He uses sign language and speech to communicate. Recently he was given a type of IQ test and was tested to have the IQ of a 5 year-old. He is improving in speech and sign every day. I think that if a child is implanted he/she should also be taught sign because you never know what might happen to the implant or to the processer. This boy I know will be prepared to function in both the hearing and deaf world with the help of his implant and sign language. Another thing, his implant could save his life one day. What if he were out playing in his street with his brother tomorrow(they live in a cul-de-sac), and a car goes speeding in there, his brother might forget to tell him to move, but he will probably hear that car because of his implant. Anyway, I think of an implant is approached in the right way, with the right attitude, and if the child is educated with total communication (speech and sign) then implants can be a very beneficial thing. |
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Lighthouses Member Posts: 2 |
posted 01-27-2001 06:11 PM
I am signed ASL; SEE and some Cue Speech. I can Lip-read well. My voice go like crazy but it's going very nice for me. I wearing hearing aids not CI. I live in Milwaukee Metro Area in WI. I am 21 yrs if you want to know me. My speech is poor but fair. Any questions?. Michelle |
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mecoda New Member Posts: 1 |
posted 04-27-2001 08:25 AM
Im a Coda myself.....child of deaf adults...I still live in the deaf/hearing world...i love the deaf community....I have very mixed feelings about coholear implants,at first I was very against it,deaf like being deaf well most of the people I know.....I once went to a meeting for deaf, and there were 2 speakers that had implants,one of the people have deaf parents there stories were very compeling.I felt very differently afterwards..I mean her explained the sounds of rain hitting the window sill..I mean wow!!!!! It was intense..this story touched my heart,and I remembered growing up praying to god at night to let them be able to hear my voice just once......so I also can relate......I cherish my deaf heritage.but at the same time if my parents had the same choices..who knows......it really is a tough decision......just thought I would share the window sill story....... |
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DaveG New Member Posts: 1 |
posted 05-15-2001 11:36 AM
I've found that sometimes memebers of the Deaf community think hearing people either dislike deaf people, or look down on them. I think that's mainly mistaken. I don't think most hearing people think about the deaf much at all. |
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Kindred Spirit Member Posts: 3 |
posted 01-06-2002 05:37 PM
Cochlear Implants are not all bad, however, I believe it is wrong to implant children. Hearing parents often do not know all (if any) the information about Deaf Culture, ASL, etc... They want their child(ren) to be hearing just like them and they don't want to listen to any other advice. There is a beautiful Deaf world out there, and contrary to popular hearing belief, deaf people do lead rich and rewarding lives without the ability to hear. The cochlear implant is a way to "fix" this disability. But the hearing majority needs to see this not as a disability to be fixed, but as a communication barrier to overcome. The stark reality is when a deaf child is implanted, they are usually mainstreamed into the hearing (public school) world. They are denied their natural, native language (ASL), and are denied their heritage which is Deaf Culture. To those who do not know, when it comes to speechreading/lipreading only 30% of the spoken word is visible on the lips. Would you like to go through life licking up only 30% of the conversation? Please, please do not be so quick to "fix" a problem... it isn't a problem... the hearing world only sees it that way. |
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alibugmom Member Posts: 3 |
posted 01-08-2002 10:45 PM
I am the hearing mother of a deaf child. She is 5 and has had her implant since October. She is now learning to identify the sounds she is hearing. The day after her implant was hooked up she went to school.(She is in an ESE prek program). She was eatig her breakfast when the morning bell rang. The look on her face when she looked up at me was the most beautiful excited face I have ever seen! She heard the bell! She was excited and wanted to know what it was and wanted to hear it again. She still gets excited every time the bell rings and tells us what it is. Every new sound to her is precious, we know that because it is so wonderfully obvious. Picture a child on Christmas morning opening the gift that they had been wanting all year long. This is my daughter every day now when she hears sounds that are taken for granted every day. Microwave, water running, toilet flushing, refrigeratoe running, all of these to her are exciting. How can anyone with any decency condem me for giving her that and so much more? I was not and am not ashamed of her deafness. She is a precious gift from GOD, so is knowledge. Doctors and the technology they use are gifts also. |
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Dreamsiklz New Member Posts: 1 |
posted 01-08-2002 11:58 PM
I am a teacher of the deaf in a public school. My experience as a teacher includes teaching both children with cochlear implants and without. Deafness is a very debilitating disability (due to the language and communication barriers), yet very pretty because of the nature of sign language. The human body is constructed to carry out the five senses we've all learned about in kindergarten. Hearing IS one of those senses. When a child is born and a part of their body is not functioning the way it was meant to, it's a natural reaction for parents to feel concerned, afraid, disappointed or saddened. At the time a parent is told their child is deaf, major decisions must be made. Although I am not deaf nor do not have a deaf child, I do not pretend to say I understand the anguish involved in making such decisions, however as an educator of deaf children I do hold a very fervent opinion on the type of education I offer in my program. Each child should be viewed as an individual. Some children will benefit from a cochlear implant and some will not. To say ALL or NONE is unacceptable and close-minded. First and foremost TOTAL COMMUNICATION is a priority. I DO NOT walk around my classroom with my hand in front of my mouth so that lip reading cannot take place. Personally, I think that's cruel and wastes a lot of precious time that could be used for teaching grade level skills. I speak and I sign and I will use whatever I can to communicate, educate and foster an environment that builds self esteem. I do teach in a hearing public school and I do expose my students to deaf culture. I watched the movie on PBS this evening SOUND OF FURY, which inspired me to write this. My heart went out to both view points on the subject and bottom line... there is no right or wrong answer, but to love your child, show A LOT of support for your child and LISTEN to his/her feelings as well. I love my job, I love all my students and I teach each and every one of them in a way that they learn best. |
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dan_meyers Member Posts: 3 |
posted 01-09-2002 12:07 AM
This is in reply to KindredSpirit's last post. Why is it not possible for a child of Deaf parents to be able to speak and hear, and also know ASL and be a part of Deaf culture? Hearing children of Deaf parents do this, as we saw in the film. So, why can't a Deaf child of Deaf parents who gets a cochlear implant do the same? I won't close my child off from any culture, be it hearing, Deaf, Jewish, African American, European, or whatever other culture in which one feels one can find value. Also, I would like to point out again that, for the most part, Deaf parents who happen to have hearing children have the luxury of talking to them in their native language, ASL, because these kids generally learn ASL. Do you in the Deaf community who oppose implants for children realize that this would deny hearing parents of Deaf children the same luxury that you take for granted as the parents of hearing children? Children who can hear, whether born hearing or with hearing aids or implants can learn to speak and can sign also! If their family is hearing, and they don't learn sign as well as some Deaf people, that's OK. If their family is Deaf, and they don't learn to speak as well as some hearing people, that's OK too. There are lots of different viewpoints in the world, and lots of different options, so please, I would like it if some in the Deaf community who are opposed to implants would try to understand the viewpoint and experiences of hearing parents of deaf kids as much as they want to be understood themselves. |
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RNMom New Member Posts: 1 |
posted 01-09-2002 12:23 AM
I am the mother of a 6 year-old child; not a deaf child, not a hearing child, not a cochlear kid. My daughter was born hearing and lost it as an infant; before language began to develop. Just before she was 3 she was implanted. It was a decision that had been 2 years in the making. We carefully researched it, asked every question imaginable, and weighed each piece of information. Something I always used to ask of every new C.I. Team Member I met was, "What about the cases when it doesn't work. Then what?" The usual reply I got was something like, "The only cases that are not successful are the ones who don't get follow-up." I didn't know it then, but I should have pushed harder for a better answer. My daughter was implanted almost 4 years ago. She still does not get meaningful use of this device. It causes her severe headaches, which, over the years, has made her almost afraid of sound. Several physicians and audiologists have evaluated the internal and external components and cannot find any abnormalities or malfunctions. Reprogramming was a routine occurence without benefit. It simply did not work for her. In her opinion sound is a painful nuisance she has the option of refusing. She tells me that she would rather sign than talk and she prefers the silence. How can you argue with that? If at some point she decides that she wants to pursue this again, I will help her do that. But it has to be her choice. I don't mean to persuade any arguments over "which side is right". But I do think that anyone considering this for themselves or their children should be aware that there are times when it is unsuccessful. If I had it to do over again, would I make the same decision? I don't know. |
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jamwitten Member Posts: 2 |
posted 01-09-2002 12:26 AM
Just saw the film on PBS. Wow! the debate continues. My deaf son is 25 now and I know opposed to the choclear. But if he were born now, I would have it done. I think the deaf child can live in both worlds. I think too many deaf schools fail and we have a rising crime rate among deaf youth...especially those that didn't have deaf parents. He is a great adventurer, base jumping,(jumping from any high enough place with a parachute), works for the forest service, and is the sweetest kid I know. I apologized for my signing skills the other day and he told me that at least I try. He said too many other deaf who have hearing parents don't even try to sign. I love my kid! I refused to raise him orally. It was too precious to see the light come into his eyes when he was given sign language. He used to run get the book for me at 20 months because he knew language was in there. I think children can learn to speak with a cochlear and sign because his sister and brother did just that! They were hearing, but they learned to sign first then talk. When they did talk, they articulated beautifully. So if the deaf child had a cochlear and were signed to and talked to together, they would probably sign first and then talk and everyone could be happy. |
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silentfire Member Posts: 3 |
posted 01-09-2002 12:53 AM
Why does the "deaf community" ostrasize their own people simply because the choose to interact with the hearing community through speech instead of interpretation??? What are they so paranoid about?? change? We have a 3 and 1/2 year old who is deaf---BUT--has made tremendous leaps and bounds with new technology which all but cures a defined handicapped. If your child was injured would u take him to a doctor?? If they had cancer would u give them chemo to save their life?? these are just a few mild examples of why many hearing people dont understand why with a world of opportunity,some of these precious children are alienated from 99% percent of the world around them, many whom could mainstream into this world where opportunities where faith can make u reach the top of your potentional and are not limited to a minority sub-culture I believe that complete social intergration of deaf people into the hearing world is not only a wonderful oppourtunity but a probable reality in the very new future....Let us all rise to our limits and help each other to the top...God Bless America...United We Stand,Divided we Fall...lets all follow the Golden Rule and progress will ultimatly prevail. |
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silentfire Member Posts: 3 |
posted 01-09-2002 12:57 AM
quote:kbesmer@msn.com |
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Deafgrrrl Member Posts: 3 |
posted 01-09-2002 01:31 AM
I am HOH.(born HOH with mild-moderate low frequncy loss) I grew up in the hearing world, speechread, and wear hearing aids. I only discovered Deaf culture when I was in high school, as I was the only deaf/hoh kid in my school district. However I discovered something neat. I am both Deaf AND hearing. I get the best of both worlds. I can listen to my beloved Indigo Girls, but I can also carry on a conversation without making a sound. (with both Deaf and hearing people) I can understand the debate from both sides. I like being able to hear but I also enjoy having "enhanced vision". What many hearing people have to understand is that we don't think of ourselves as being "hearing imapired." Rather we see ourselves as a visually based culture! It has been proven by at least one medical study that Deaf people's brains are wired differently from hearing people's brains. The part that hearing people use for hearing, we use for sight! Virtually no educational program that I have heard of , capitlizes on that strengh. Most of us prelingally Deaf are visual learners! Why hasn't the hearing world realized that? It hasn't. I hope the day comes when the hearing world realizes that being Deaf is not a disabilty, but rather a gateway to a whole new culture! Many of us in the Deaf-World realize that we need to live in both the hearing and Deaf worlds. There are people who consider themselves cultrally Deaf who have extremely mild hearing loss and there are also people in the Deaf-world who have a CI! Lots of kids at Gally use CI, and there are some people over at Deaf-Notes who use CI,but still consider themselves cultrally Deaf. The Deaf-World isn't against hearing! It realizes that it's members need to suceed in a hearing world, but it also would like an acknowlegment from the hearing world that perhaps there is something good about having enhanced vision! The Deaf-world is against ORALISM. (Spoken English only) programs. I have never understood why proponets of oralism, claim that their way is better when it is limiting kids to ONE language. Only the most radical Deaf activists would say that it is best to only teach kids with hearing loss Sign. Virtually everyone else in the Deaf community agrees that being bilingal is the best thing in the world. That is the key...BILINGALISM. Not ASL-only or Oralism-only but a program that would ensure fluency in BOTH languages! Two languages are better then one! |
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deafteacher New Member Posts: 1 |
posted 01-09-2002 12:28 PM
Hello Everyone !! First, let me say that I am thankful that PBS presented the complexity of this issue. I also applaud the deaf family for searching for answers and making an informed decision. Second, as a hearing teacher in a residential school for the deaf, I must react to the comment that deaf schools stink ! The one thing that was not even approached was the education issue. Over 90% of our students in the high school come to us from the mainstream. After they have failed or after their "interpreters" have given them "help" for years and years, they are then sent to the deaf school and we are supposed to "fix" them. They graduate from here and then it looks as if we don't provide good education. For example, I had a student who came to us as a sophomore who could not spell "cat". Was this our fault?? Furthermore, these students have a lot of emotional problems because they do not have appropriate socialization and are often ignored. Sometimes, they are told that by implanting or putting a hearing aid on them that they will be "hearing". The implant does not produce true sound as we know it. Teenagers often take off the implant and then are profoundly deaf because the implant destroys any good residual hearing. By using a hearing aid and good speech/language services, these students do just fine. Another issue with deafness is that many of our students are not just deaf. They often have other learning disabilities along with it. The mainstream schools keep the "good" students which therefore continues the perception that deaf schools have low education. To complicate things, families must often hire lawyers and sue their school district in order for their children to get the education they deserve. Here at the deaf school, communication is free and accessible 24 hours a day. Students can participate in sports and many other activities. They also mainstream at the public school for several classes so they get experiences with interpreters and public classrooms. Here they get the best of everything. I for one, work my tail off to teach students in any way possible. I teach on grade level courses in Sociology, Psychology, Government, History, World Cultures, History. My students have won every mock trial competition against HEARING schools for the past 2 years. I am not sure why it has to be one or the other. Why can't those with implants also learn sign language? Perhaps a future special could be on the education options and the legalities of it all. This is more important than whether or not to implant. [This message has been edited by deafteacher (edited 01-09-2002).] |
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bbj New Member Posts: 1 |
posted 01-09-2002 07:02 PM
Imagine a poor naive single-parent whose 3year old was just diagnosed with mild-to-moderate hearing loss in both ears. She thinks all she has to worry about is the issue of deciding what is best for her daughter: what schools, what hearing aids, etc. Then she finds out that she's been dropped into the middle of a raging war where any decision she makes will be condemned. Why can't my daughter be accepted for who she is no matter how she communicates or who she communcates with? Will the deaf community close her out unless she agrees to abide by their rules? In the end, I've decided that all I have to worry about IS what is best for my daughter. If she's not accepted because of decisions I make I feel sorry for the people who missed out on such a wonderful child. |
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silentfire Member Posts: 3 |
posted 01-09-2002 08:07 PM
right on bbj that is exactly how I feel. It is hard enough to deal with the responsiblities involed with your child's recently diagnosed disability let alone with bigoted fantic how only have their own interest at heart! quote: |
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jamwitten Member Posts: 2 |
posted 01-10-2002 06:28 AM
Hi Deaf teacher, Why did my son get into so much trouble in deaf schools after doing ok in mainstream? I did not see enough supervision and the transportion was a nightmare.
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Cferra Member Posts: 10 |
posted 01-10-2002 09:52 AM
My personal experience is this: I'm 23 years old. I'm a senior at college and I have had digital hearing aids since I started college. I had regular over the ear hearing aids since I was 2 years old. During my early years I had speech therapy and the usual teasing kids. It was their problem anyways. This lady helped me to talk well. I can speak in many different languages too including Italian, Spanish, Japanese and many others. It comes with being a political science major I guess. I am thankdful my "hearing" parents wanted me to get hearing aids. I had problems hearing professors but everything turned out well in the end. I have a great GPA average and I always did well in school, despite the teasing, that went away in high school. Oh and I'm like 70% deaf in one ear and 80% in the other. My deafness was due to bone deformation and nerve damage. I'm not totally deaf. I can hear people yelling with my hearing aids off, the phone and all sorts of things. There's more to the story but let me just finally say through adversity I managed to come on top and I got the coolest friends who don't care if I got hearing aids. Course, maybe people are now being open minded oor scard I'll kick there butts =P Anyways, yeah I was put in "special classes" I got out of those quite quickly and once I got to college things were much better. Issues were resolved and teaing ended. Now I have a high GPA and am on the verge of graduating with a degree in Political Science. Least I got over a lot of problems. As for my views on the video, see my response in the video section. |
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Kindred Spirit Member Posts: 3 |
posted 01-10-2002 03:13 PM
It is, indeed, possible for a deaf child to speak, however, to implant child is nothing more than trying to "FIX" a "defective" child. Did you see the documentary? The CODA (Child of Deaf Adults) who was the mother of Peter clearly did not accept her sons deafness as well as her parents deafness. If she did, she would not have used the word "normal" and would accept and love her baby the way he is. And, by the way, what is "normal"? The majority of hearing parents who implant their children do it for the convenience of themselves and the hearing world. To go into any McDonalds and order a hamburger for themselves by speaking, is nothing more than for the ease for the hearing person. Do you really think that lipreading is easy? I understand other points of view, however, it is up to the hearing world to let go of the "normal" view of others and accept people for who they are... and not try to fix what isn't in need of fixing! Also, you say you would not want to close of your child from any culture, but by forcing your child to speak, hear with a cochlear, lipread, etc... that is exactly what you are doing. By denying them the right to sign language and their Deaf Culture, you are shutting them out. Funny how hearing people think they know everything!
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grgogrl Member Posts: 2 |
posted 01-10-2002 03:32 PM
I wanted to know why the hearing impaired always seem so angry that the hearing cannot use sign language. I work in the retail environment where I meet people of all different cultures. We struggle to interact in many languages but we work it out together. If I am helping a hearing impaired person they get angry that I do not know their language. I have self taught my self the alphabet but because I do not interact daily with deaf people I am very rusty and my hands fumble. Perhaps if the deaf community interacted and taught the hearing and showed compassion for our ineptness we could all learn something. |
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Darius Member Posts: 2 |
posted 01-10-2002 04:40 PM
I have a very different retail experience. I do know some, though not a lot, of ASL, and whenever I have helped a deaf person, they have been surprised and greatful. My ASL is far from fluent, so we mostly stumble through with a combination of ASL, fingerspelling, gestures, and sometimes the written word. They seem used to communicating anyway they can. I've never noticed anyone, helped by me or by non-signing coworkers who expected everyone to know sign. I'm sure there are some. There are also Americans who go to forign countries and expect them all to speak English. But I think and hope that they are the minority in both cases. |
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Nora Member Posts: 7 |
posted 01-11-2002 02:53 AM
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Nora Member Posts: 7 |
posted 01-11-2002 03:25 AM
quote: I am a hearing adult with a profoundly deaf brother and 3-year-old daughter. I, too, am bothered that the film portrayed only deaf people who use sign. My brother was raised orally and nobody ever signed with him. He talked and read lips. He learned sign in college and uses it now only to communicate with other deaf people. I would not consider him part of the deaf culture -- he's married to a hearing woman and has hearing children. My daughter has never been exposed to a single sign. She got hearing aids at 8 months and a cochlear implant at 1 1/2. She has speech and language that is above most hearing kids her age. One thing that it seems many people don't realize is that children who are signed with while they are learning to listen and talk with their implant do not do as well as children who are in oral programs. If your goal as a parent who is implanting your child is that your child will develop normal or near-normal speech and language, then sign language will impede your child's ability to achieve that. A good deal of recent research has found that early implanted children develop intelligible spoken language at the same rate as their hearing peers when they are in oral programs. The same is not true for early implanted children in signing programs. These children are primarily using visual means to communicate and therefore the auditory (ear) takes on a secondary role at a time when it's crucial for the brain to develop the capacity to make use of sound. Brain research tells us that very young children's brains are "wired" just right for learning language. That's why those of us who have our kids in oral programs are implanting early and taking advantage of this time when the brain is "ripe" for learning langauge. We know if we miss this window of time, the speech and language skills our kids acquire will never be as good. Many implanted children who are placed in signing programs never develop the hoped-for speech and language skills. The balme then goes to the implant, when actually it should go to the communication method. I don't understand why so many people feel their child will be missing out on something if he or she is a deaf person who doesn't sign. My three year old communicates beautifully with many deaf children in her preschool by talking and listening. She communicates with her deaf uncle the same way. Sadly, Heather in the film will never have this ability. She's effectively cut off from direct interaction with most of the world. Also, do people realize that the average reading level among deaf people raised with ASL as a first langauge is 3rd grade? It's the ASL langauge which impedes literacy skills, not the schools. Look at the statistics for deaf children raised orally. They have much better literacy rates. |
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Mixed Blessingz New Member Posts: 1 |
posted 01-11-2002 07:21 AM
Why the name some of you ask? Its simple, the wonderful birth of my daughter was preceded a week by the death of my husband, and followed by the harsh reality that she was born deaf due to a undeveloped cochlea. Where most people have a cochlea, she does not. What makes this so much more of a mixed blessing, is the fact that I have been an active member of the deaf community since I was a teenager. I had a friend in grade school, who was hearing but developed a brain tumor, causing her to go deaf, as she learned sign, I learned sign, to make things so much easier for her. We went through four years of school together, until she lost her battle with cancer and died. By that time I was fairly fluent in both ASL and English Sign, and had many deaf friends. At the age of 16 I graduated high school and decided I wanted to teach the deaf or act as an interpeter. College led me to becoming a teacher and I now teach deaf students. I am also lucky enough to be able to teach my daughter her language. Every day, there are more and more advances in techknowlogy, some of them benefiting the deaf, and it saddens me that so many of them have an attitude of looking down on those advances. If my daughter were a canidate for a CI, I'd sign her up for it immediately so that she could welcomingly embrace both worlds. Every day we battle racism, descrimination and hatred. Why, when the means to obliterate some of that are available, we would ignore those means and look down on them is beyond me. I know some who are deaf think I don't understand, but I do. I have been the mother of a deaf child for 20 months, I have been a teacher of the deaf for 3 years and a part of the community for nearly eight years. ASL is so much a part of my life, that not even realizing it, when I'm talking to another hearing person, I am signing, its a part of my life and the beauty and grace of the language never ceases to amaze me. And I know the joy when for the first time, four months ago, my daughter was able to sign I Love you mommy and completely understand what she was saying. As any other mother of a deaf child, whether they are hearing or deaf themselves, would know, the joy of that moment when your child signs their first sign, that moment they identify you as mommy (or for the fathers out there, daddy), the moment they can tell you they love you, that joy is so indescribable. There are no words for what you feel. But you know, that is the begining of the rest of thier future. |
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