posted 01-09-2002 04:30 PM         

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Originally posted by Renee:
You are hearing and so is your wife. You have a hearing child. YOU HAVE never been in the shoes of a parent who has a child who is deaf. Yet you take it upon yourself to call parents LAZY???

Well, sir I can assure you I am the least lazy parent of all. I have been to so many audiology appoinments and therapy sessions with my child that I have lost count. I have a teacher of the deaf come to my house every week. I stay up every night to learn sign language so my one year old can communicate. Have you ever had to learn a language over night so you can start to talk with your child? You are swimming in the prolific stereotype put forth by some anti-cochlear implant individuals and it is sad. You have never sat in a sound booth with your sleeping child in your lap and had some stranger tell you that your child is profoundly deaf. You have absolutely no ground to stand on when it comes to judging another parent's decisions. How pathetic that people like you chastise other parents. I wonder if your child were to go blind, would you deny a laser surgery to restore sight? What if your child contracted cancer and they had to take her leg? Would you deny her a prosthesis? After all, she isn't "broken". Maybe the scientific community should take Stephen Hawkins computer voice away. After all, we shouldn't be allowed to use technological aids right? Or is it only against the rules to use a cochlear implant. Why is it the deaf feel like their culture is so much better than the blind culture or the folks who are relagated to wheel chairs because their legs have failed them. Do they feel like elitists?

I have heard it a million times. My child won't fit into either world with an implant. That just makes me laugh out loud at the absolute shallowness of the comment. She will be defined by the environment and culture in which she is raised. Her family and her surroundings will define her personality. She can really be anyone she wants to be. Of course, there will be those out there who see her implant and slam the door in her face. So be it. They will miss out a beautiful heart.

You know, the day I found out she was deaf I was told she and we would be embraced by the "deaf community". Well, that is we will be embraced until we mention that she is an implant candidate. Once you mention that, they frown and start to scold us. Thank God we have met a lot of deaf individuals who did embrace us and my child is surrounded by these loving people. For those of you who make judgement calls, you need to wake up.

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posted 01-09-2002 09:59 PM         

I think the question to the anti-ci crowd is to explain why being Deaf and having a ci are mutually exclusive?

As more and more people who view themselves as culturally Deaf are getting cis for either themselves and/or their children and even organizations long opposed to cis for children such as the NAD now support the right of parents to choose cis as an option for their child; their militiant anti-ci stance keeps pushing them further and further towrds the fringes.

To those whose concern with the ci is its impact upon Deaf Culture, your self-centered view of the issue is out of touch with the reality of the decisions parents of deaf children face and make.

As a parent of a child who, among many things, is deaf and has a ci, the decision we made was based upon what we determined to be in her best interests. It was a well informed and reasoned decision with our daughter's best interests in our minds and in our hearts. What impact, if any, it would have upon Deaf Culture never entered into our decision. Nor should it have. Our duahgter does not exist merely to serve as fodder for the preservation and continuation of Deaf Culture. She is a uniquely wonderful person with her own individual needs and identity. If the anti-ci crowd views her only as a deaf child with a ci, then they have missed the essence of who she truly is and that is their loss. Our concern was to give her the opportunity to be all that she chooses to be.

posted 01-09-2002 10:05 PM         

quote:

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Originally posted by chopsuey70:
if i had a child that was deaf i would not be interest in the implant what so ever. I believe that it is not a disablity at all god made us that way and there is a reason for it.

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Have you read the New Testament of The Bible? Did you notice that Jesus HEALS the sick and lame. He doesn't just say 'My father made you that way for a reason'

posted 01-10-2002 01:40 PM         

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Originally posted by dan_meyers:
In response to nbinder's comment of "if the implants work so well, why are the kids still in deaf schools?"

Yes, the implants do work VERY well, but not without the therapy and education to back them up. You don't just get an implant and that's it. The implant is a tool which the recipient must learn to use. My daughter (who was born deaf and has an implant) has been attending an oral program at a preschool for deaf children, and she is now speaking and hearing very well, and will be attending mainstream public kindergarten next year, right on schedule.

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posted 01-10-2002 03:37 PM         

Some people have asked what exactly deaf culture is. I don't know that I can explain that, not being Deaf myself. But my knowledge of the history helps me to understand the concept of Deaf culture. Maybe it will help some of you who feel confused by it. I unfortunanly missed the first part of the show, so if any of this was covered, I appoligise for the repetion. Also, it is possible that I am remembering this wrong, so please don't take my statements as unequivocally correct.

I would imagine that the idea of deafness as a culture that is as "normal" as hearing comes to some extent from early American history when on Martha's Vinyard where there was such a large deaf population that everyone on the island - hearing and deaf - spoke sign language. I would imagine that under those circumstances, deafness was not seen as being a handicap. Also, I think that the Deaf have traditionally been forced to be an insular culture simply because those are the people who speak the same language. Also, Deaf children often go to residential schools where they grow up, not in the hearing world, but in the deaf school culture. And it is only recently that technological advances have made it possible for Deaf people to participate in many aspects of the hearing world. I remember reading about how before closed captions, Deaf people would watch a show, and then afterwards would talk about it at lenght with other Deaf people discussing what they each thought had happened. Some actually missed this interactive aspect once closed captioning was availible. And Deaf people have customs in socal gettogethers that date from a time before technology made phone conversations possible and everything had to be done face to face.

This is just a smattering of things that I remember off the top of my brain. Those are some of the things that I think of when I think of Deaf Culture. I can only imagine living my whole life with these things only to have people tell me that my child will be better off not experiencing it. I'm not anti-implant, but I can understand the parent's fears. I think it is very similar to the reactions of many imigrant parents who's children are suddenly living in a different world than they are even while living in the same house.

Perhaps technology will, and maybe should, eventually eliminate deafness, and with it Deaf Culture. But I think it is important to realize that such a thing does exist and, though intertwined with the language issue, is more than just language.

posted 01-10-2002 10:21 PM         

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Originally posted by D:
To be honest, It's hard for us to explain to you about Deaf Culture. That's right you guys never will understand Deaf Culture because you guys are not deaf. We, Deaf people cherish our value Deaf Culture. It's like Mystery "clicked" feelings.
That's all I can say. I am sorry.

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We do? I think Deaf culture is great but not all deaf people are a part of deaf culture you know. I'm not in deaf culture even though I am deaf and have hearing aids. I'm deaf. Does that mean I HAVE to be a part of deaf culture even if I have no interest in it? Besides, how can I, as a deaf person who has never learned sign language function in the culture? I talk pretty well and I'll take any medical advances science throws at me. Hence my computer programmed hearing aids.
Just remember, not ALL deaf people shouldn't have to be a part of deaf culture. I'm deaf. Do I have to be a part of it? If it means alenating the very good friends I have, no way. And that's exactly what the family did by moving to Maryland. They alienated everyone and became like an exclusive country club. I'm sorry, Like George Bush Sr said "Not gonna do it!"
I never been exposed to deaf culture and even though it's great and all, I don't need to be a part of it. Why do I have to? I like my friends in the "hearing world" People accept me because I accept them and I don't judge people, unlike the stubborn people in the video.

posted 01-11-2002 02:11 PM         

Talk about deaf issues
Hear their child laughing
and more.

posted 01-11-2002 05:00 PM         

quote:

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Originally posted by D:
To be honest, It's hard for us to explain to you about Deaf Culture. That's right you guys never will understand Deaf Culture because you guys are not deaf. We, Deaf people cherish our value Deaf Culture. It's like Mystery "clicked" feelings.
That's all I can say. I am sorry.

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It is not that hard to explain, if you were handicap you would want to be around other handicap because that world is safe. I have yet to see blind, crippled, ect. clubs though. I guess perhaps sitting around talking about who is more handicap, who sees less, who walks less, who uses the wrong type of cane, or glasses or who has more handicap children and about the pride they have because they have a handicapped child isn't a very positive type of meeting. However organizations that look for cures in the other handicaps (other than deafness because most memebers can hear) I hear have many followers.

posted 01-11-2002 05:04 PM         

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Originally posted by craigup:
So explain this. since my wife and other two boys can hear, I am not suppose to have a deaf daughter? I am not ashamed of it I love her very much more than anything in the world.Are you saying that since the rest of the family can hear maybe I should give her to a deaf person. WRONG! She will have a good life and benifit from any technology now or forever.

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posted 01-11-2002 05:56 PM         

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Originally posted by Cferra:
Very good response Amy! I agree wholeheartedly with what you said. I fall under the category of deaf guy living in a all hearing family. Course, my deafness was not genetic. It was due to bone deformation and nerve damage within the auditory structure of the inner ear.
Growing up as a deaf child in anall hearing family was not bad for me. I was treated like everyone else. Although, I had to leave my hearing aids by the pool when swimming. I still heard them shouting so it was okay. My parents love me and treated me like I'd want to be treated, like everyone else. I only got frustrated in school.But, that was because tests were hard but hey, I pulled through okay. Even got a standing ovation once at a sports awards ceremony.
Anyways, you are correct that not all deaf parents have deaf kids and the same works the other way. My parents had me and they didn't treat me any different. They just let me live my life, so what if I had hearing aids. It wasn't a big deal because it was corrected and my parents wanted me to be the best I can be no matter what.
Yes I was teased and all that but I got over that and it went away in college. My life is a success story, I can't imagine why people wouldn't want the same for their kids. The least the video could have shown was people who have hearing aids, can speak well. I speak very well. Too bad they didn't contact me. Oh well.
I never experienced deaf culture and now I'm definitly sure I don't. I didn't need to before and I don't need to. I don't get frustrated with my friends, who can hear. Becasuse they understand and respect me.
I don't really need an implant but it's nice to know its availible. But still, the deaf culture people seemed fanatical in that video. Not much can be done about it besides rant on a message board and talk to people about it.
In closing, yeah I was treated like everyone else, by my brother, my friends, my family. I have lived a good life. I don't know why someone would want a similar one in education and what not. My life is good. I grew up in a loving enviroment where I wasn't judged because no one really cared. In fact, I was in class once when I had to change a battery and I got all kinds of questions I was glad to answer. Try to be more accepting to people who can hear. If people see both sides of the issue and any other issue, we'd all be a lot happier. The only closed minded people in the video were the ones preaching the need to peserve deaf culture.

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posted 01-11-2002 06:35 PM         

quote:

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Originally posted by Renee:
You are hearing and so is your wife. You have a hearing child. YOU HAVE never been in the shoes of a parent who has a child who is deaf. Yet you take it upon yourself to call parents LAZY???

Well, sir I can assure you I am the least lazy parent of all. I have been to so many audiology appoinments and therapy sessions with my child that I have lost count. I have a teacher of the deaf come to my house every week. I stay up every night to learn sign language so my one year old can communicate. Have you ever had to learn a language over night so you can start to talk with your child? You are swimming in the prolific stereotype put forth by some anti-cochlear implant individuals and it is sad. You have never sat in a sound booth with your sleeping child in your lap and had some stranger tell you that your child is profoundly deaf. You have absolutely no ground to stand on when it comes to judging another parent's decisions. How pathetic that people like you chastise other parents. I wonder if your child were to go blind, would you deny a laser surgery to restore sight? What if your child contracted cancer and they had to take her leg? Would you deny her a prosthesis? After all, she isn't "broken". Maybe the scientific community should take Stephen Hawkins computer voice away. After all, we shouldn't be allowed to use technological aids right? Or is it only against the rules to use a cochlear implant. Why is it the deaf feel like their culture is so much better than the blind culture or the folks who are relagated to wheel chairs because their legs have failed them. Do they feel like elitists?

I have heard it a million times. My child won't fit into either world with an implant. That just makes me laugh out loud at the absolute shallowness of the comment. She will be defined by the environment and culture in which she is raised. Her family and her surroundings will define her personality. She can really be anyone she wants to be. Of course, there will be those out there who see her implant and slam the door in her face. So be it. They will miss out a beautiful heart.

You know, the day I found out she was deaf I was told she and we would be embraced by the "deaf community". Well, that is we will be embraced until we mention that she is an implant candidate. Once you mention that, they frown and start to scold us. Thank God we have met a lot of deaf individuals who did embrace us and my child is surrounded by these loving people. For those of you who make judgement calls, you need to wake up.

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posted 01-11-2002 06:53 PM         

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Originally posted by Judas:
Check this out if you would like to open your mind a little no pun intended.
http://www.mutate.co.nz/operate/index.html

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